Not a good time of year

This has got to be the worse time of the year for my family...two years ago we hospitalized my nephew for 4 weeks due to some psychological problems. Tonight in between work and my first night of softball conditioning he had another episode similar to what had him "committed" before. I believe it was his bipolar disorder flaring up but it was almost scary to witness. Then on top that we've had several deaths in our family during this time of year. It sure would be nice to have a happy holiday season.

On a good note...conditioning went good tonight. I have a feeling that the majority of them will be very sore tomorrow morning. Wonder how many of them won't come back tomorrow...

Where did the last four days go???

Well I certainly can't believe it's already Sunday night...I'm not ready for a new work week to start. Not only is it another work week but softball conditioning starts tomorrow. Not looking forward to dealing with about 40 teenage girls...anyone want to trade places with me? It hopefully won't go too bad. I hope any way.

We finally had our family time at the movies. Old Dogs, another great movie. We missed all the previews and didn't get to sit together because we got there so late!

I started my training today...mini marathon in April. It'll be my 2nd one. The first was in October 2008. I had originally planned on doing the Walt Disney Marathon in January 2010...I had even done about 2.5 months of training when I decided I didn't want to use my vacation time to fly to Orlando to compete in the race. It would be wasting time I'd get to spend with my hubby when he comes home on R&R and when his deployment is over next fall...we plan on taking a long vacation...the honeymoon we never got. We got married on June 27th and he deployed August 15th. Can't wait!

Go Cats!

Well tonight was suppose to be a family night of a movie (Old Dogs) and dinner with my parents and niece and nephew. We still haven't made it to the movie and I don't see that happening tonight considering it's almost 9:00. My dad wanted to watch the start of the UK football game but we thought it'd be a blow out...it's not! The Cats are only down by 3 at the start of the 4th quarter! At least during the game I got my online Safety class for softball done. I've only known about it for 3 months and it had to be done before Monday...nothing like procrastination!

Back to the game...GO CATS!!!

Game Plan Time

With Thanksgiving dinner over and the kids in their rooms, it's time to plan our strategy for the chaotic madness tomorrow morning that is known as Black Friday. My mom and I have made this a tradition for the past 4 years. I'm just thankful this year we don't have any big ticket items we have to fight in line for...whew thank goodness! We started our shopping last weekend so we might be able to finish tomorrow except for a few small things.

Good luck to all of you who are braving the chaos in the wee hours of the morning...try to stay warm!

Tick Tock

Well I've officially started my count down for my 4 day holiday weekend...t-minus 30 minutes! My hubby has helped the afternoon fly by...thankfully, for me anyway, he couldn't sleep so he's been IMing me all afternoon. Not the same as hearing his voice but it was a much needed talk. I miss the days of being able to text him all day while I was at work...those days will be back here before I know it. These next 6.5 months are going to fly by because softball starts on Monday (well conditioning for those who are up to my workouts)...I'm so not prepared. Last year I had the first 3 weeks worth of workouts done a month ahead of time. Not the story this year...I've been traveling so much for my real job I haven't been able to even think softball...but I do have a four day weekend to plan!

I've been reading a lot of lists for what others are thankful for, so here's a few things I am thankful for:

1. Family that supports me through anything.
2. My husband.
3. The men and women that serve our country day in and day out.
4. Having a job in this economy.
5. Being able to pay all our bills on time every month.
6. Having friends that have my back no matter what.
7. My niece and nephew who have lost so much.
8. My brother who saved my life (his death brought me out of a 10 year depression - however, I'd give anything to take his place so his kids could have one parent back)
9. My dad for always pushing my to be my best.
10. Kodiak - my Alaskan Malamute
11. My mom for being the rock that has held our family together

Happy Thanksgiving to you and your families.

Frustrated

Ok...well I know I'm overreacting but it still really frustrates me. The past couple of weeks I've only been hearing from my husband (AJ) once a week...they're in a very remote area. This past Saturday was that day. Well this morning he IM'd my phone (at 5 AM)...he was at kaf so he had a 30 minute time limit on the computer...in that 30 minutes he only sent 5 messages and I finally woke up for the last one but by the time I responded I assume he had already gotten off. But I thought to myself at least I'll have an email waiting for me at work. Well I got to work early hoping to read an email from him responding to one of the 20 I'd sent him since the last time he'd been online. And to my surprise I had nothing. Needless to say I was very disappointed...I'm trying not to be mad but I guess I'm hurt more than mad. And on top of that he tells me he spent a little more money on a bag and more socks...well he spent $400 dollars...who spends that much money at one time while they're deployed! Needless to say I'm not too happy about that either! I don't want to argue with him about money but he tends to spend more than he has. I just recently paid off all his debt bills that we weren't aware he had from 2003...the week after he deployed his mother brought over all his mail...he'd been getting these notices for a long time and you want to know what she did...ripped them up and trashed them. I was in complete shock...she could have paid all these off his last deployment. That's a whole other issue I don't want to get into now.

Tough Decisions

Last night my dad and his sisters made the decision to bring in Hospice for my grandma...I believe this should have been done weeks ago. She is 90 years old, refuses to eat, drink or take her meds, is in kidney failure and hasn't gotten out of bed for roughly two months now maybe longer except when she's been taken to the hospital every other week. She's lived a long and healthy life and she's ready to go...she's been saying she doesn't know why she's still here. I know why...there are a few in my family that haven't been ready. Most of them have now excepted it and have said their goodbyes. I worry about how it's going to affect my niece and nephew...their parents were killed in a car accident 5.5 years ago...they were in the car too. They've experienced a few deaths since then and haven't handled it well. The girl (I'll call her T) feels she can't let herself love anyone any more because every time she does they die. The boy (W) has a hard time grasping things...he's almost 11 and is on meds for ADHD, Bipolar, Seizures, and has a learning disability (there's a possibility as he goes through puberty he will "grow" out of some of that...we can only hope).

But now my family and I have to begin the waiting game of watching her lay there and die...

Reality of War

ok...so i'm new to the blogging world...so please bear with me until I get the hang of this...

When did the war become real to you...can you remember the exact day or event? Was it the day the Twin Towers collapsed? Or when your husband, wife, son, or daughter deployed to the Middle East? Hearing your loved one's voice for the first time since being in a war zone?

The night it became real to me...
I was out with some friends that were in town for the weekend and unexpectedly received a call from my husband...I hurried outside so I could hear him better...we chit chatted for a while and then he told me...he and his guys had hit an IED...he assured me he was fine and no one had gotten hurt but the reality of what could have happened hit me like a ton of bricks...believe me I prayed and thanked God he and his guys were safe

Until his return home I will continue to pray daily that he stays safe and unharmed...